Finish the sentence

(Mild profanity and TMI alert)

Found this via vw bug.  Just finish the sentence with your answers, put it on your blog (if you have one), and link back to me.

1. My uncle once: nearly set himself on fire with a Zippo lighter.

2. Never in my life: could I play basketball worth a damn.

3. When I was five: my sister took me down the street on the back of a Big Wheel and I started screaming because my legs were up against the wheels while they were turning and got burned big-time.

4. High school was: something I have few good memories about. Except a small handful of close friends and maybe a couple of girls.

5. I will never forget: my first sexual experience (with someone other than myself).

6. Once I met: a kid that was born with only four fingers on each hand.

7. There’s this girl I know: that I used to love and occasionally wonder how she’s doing.

8. Once, at a bar: my friends & I sang The I-95 Asshole Song. Got the rest of the joint singing, too.

9. By noon, I’m usually: ready for a nap.

10. Last night: I was up too late playing Uncommon Valor on the computer.

11. If only I had: a better job that paid more.

12. Next time I go to church: I will be meeting with my only remaining Boy Scout. If he shows (update: he didn’t).

13. What worries me most: making the bills and getting out of debt.

14. When I turn my head left I see: the side of the sofa.

15. When I turn my head right I see: the TV.

16. You know I’m lying when: I don’t lie, I just evade the truth or keep my mouth shut.

17. What I miss most about the Eighties is: being single and hanging with some good friends.

18. If I were a character in Shakespeare I’d be: who knows, probably the village idiot.

19. By this time next year: I’ll have a different job and hopefully will be living elsewhere.

20. A better name for me would be: Dammit Dave!

21. I have a hard time understanding: people who do the same stupid things over and over again.

22. If I ever go back to school: I’ll actually try to go somewhere with the classes I take.

23. You know I like you if: I follow you around while talking to you.

24. If I ever won an award, the first person I would thank would be: whoever gave it to me.

25. Take my advice: don’t listen to people like me, you’ll just screw yourself up.

26. My ideal breakfast is: a well loaded breakfast burrito. Homemade. Eggs, sausage, bell peppers, onions, cheese and salsa wrapped in a fluffy tortilla. Yum!

27. A song I love but do not have is: I have all of them. If I love it I’ll get it, one way or another.

28. If you visit my hometown, I suggest you: don’t drive anywhere during rush hour (morning or afternoon).

29. Why won’t people: take responsibility for themselves rather than just dishing out blame?

30. If you spend a night at my house: hope you like the sofa.

31. I’d stop my wedding so: Huh? Why would I want to?

32. The world could do without: Michael Moore.

33. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: sit in the same room as the above (well, almost).

34. My favourite blonde(s) is/are: Sharon Stone & my daughter PBJ.

35. Paper clips are more useful than: a third butt cheek.

36. If I do anything well it’s: piss people off.

37. I can’t help but: snore and pass gas while I sleep.

38. I usually cry: when I get the electric bill for August.

39. My advice to my child/nephew/niece: follow your dreams, stay out of trouble, and know you’re loved.

40. And by the way: I gotta jump in the shower.

Anybody that comes by here and hasn’t done it already is tagged.  Cheers!

But since he doesn’t come by here much, I’ll tag Nathan, in the hopes he won’t dodge this one.  Nothing personal ladies, but I wouldn’t mind a few more guy readers. 

While I’m at it, I’ll go ahead and tag Jay, too.

~ by The Real Dave on September 11, 2008.